The Confusion II: Apologies

what gift could suppress?
the depth of your presence in my life?
You shared with me
both wisdom and dreams

Look where i stand now
Intelligence has become an offense
to the dreams you gave me
and the beauty of your presence

I am not without emotions
for through broken perspectives
I can see the pain i caused
and the anguish in Heaven

Read like ancient masters
With a memory fluid
I conquered the barriers of learning
But where are the dreams?

I felt them slip through my fingers
in the mute pursuit of happiness
let my verses tell tales of my being

I wrote it all for my own conviction
So to be my own witness
When i account for my dreams

For the dreams that faintly cry
calling for a better world
calling for a better man

you taught me to write
with metaphors and figures
But look what it is now
a reflection of despair

my poetry is menace
nothing but an echo of despair
whether i write, what good has it been?
my lines are haunted by demons
could it be all for this?
how could it be?